Documents in!

I called our agency the day they received the documents from IL and they said they are perfect!  Yay!!  Originally Crescent Moon had wanted them to be Authenticated at their embassy, but our agency's in-country contact checked with them to see if we could skip that step for the sake of time.  Surprisingly, they agreed!  So, the state-certified documents are in Crescent Moon being reviewed and our LOA should be on its way any time.  I think this is our first shortcut and I am hoping for a few more in the sake of time.  ;-)

While I was talking to my agent, I asked if we were close enough that she could guess a time frame.  She knows by now that I'm more than familiar with the unexpected and I won't call her screaming if we're a bit beyond what she guesses.  lol!  She thought that if everything goes as usual (going by the process thus far, that's unlikely, but here's to hoping!), we could get our travel papers as early as mid-March!  It's much later than I had expected when we originally started this process, but at this point I'm excited that it could be that "soon"!  I'm excited to visit in the Spring because I hear it's beautiful!!  (Then again, I would be excited to visit any time of the year because it's a new country and we're there for a wonderful reason!)  

-V

Great news!!

It seems the 4th time is a charm!  After having our documents rejected yet again by the state of IL, my mom called them to figure out why.  The lady who had rejected them was off that day, but the lady my mom spoke with couldn't tell why they were rejected.  So, mom sent them back on Friday and they are now certified and on their way to her!  Once she gets them, she said she's going to overnight them to our agency and they will get them Authenticated by the Crescent Moon embassy.  At that point, they will get sent to Crescent Moon and then we will get our LOA!!  I found out about this yesterday morning, but wasn't around my computer to update this blog.  I have been on Cloud 9 ever since!!  It was hard to sleep last night because I was so excited.  This morning, I took our van in to have it looked at.  It needs quite a bit of work (alignment, balancing, new front brakes, fuel filter, and oil change) and is going to cost 770 Euros.  Not exactly chump change.  Do I care?  Not really!  Typically somewhere around 80-110 Euros is my cutoff for freaking out about vehicle maintenance/repairs, depending on our situation that month.  (We're never really hurting for money, but our European account is kept basically paycheck to paycheck, so local expenses freak me out more than most)  Inside my head, my little mini-me has been in a constant happy dance.  And I hate dancing!  lol!!  I'm not sure how I can possibly get more excited than this when we finally get our travel approval, but I'm sure I will find a way.  ;-)

The only downer right now is that L has been talking daily about how excited she is to travel to Crescent Moon with us.  Yesterday, she spent a considerable part of the day asking about getting her own suitcase so that she can put stuff in it to bring with her, etc.  If it were up to me, she would come in a heartbeat!  Heck, I would love to bring all 3 kids!  But, D is very much against it.  I know in my head he's probably right.  But, it's so hard to tell them that they won't get to come on a trip of a lifetime to meet their new sister.  DJ will probably have school, so he would be pretty easy to explain it to.  N is too little to really care about the trip, but he's never really been away from me so I'm not sure what that's going to do to him (or me!)  But L has her heart set on going.  And when I say she "has her heart set" on it, I mean that 110%.  I worry about how crushed she will be if she doesn't get to come with us.  I can easily envision her crying the ENTIRE 2 weeks and hating us for not letting her come!  I would love to just bring her, but then I'm not sure how the boys would feel about her getting to experience it when they don't.  My ideal solution (which D thinks I'm insane for) is to take a family trip to Crescent Moon for Z's birthday.  We should be close enough by that point that we can visit her, but not close enough to actually get her, so our kids would get to meet her & see the country and yet they wouldn't be a pain during any legal proceedings.  Then when we actually get to travel to get her, the kids will know where we're going and won't feel like they're missing out on anything.  The best of both worlds!!  :-D  The only downside is that we would meet Z, but not get to bring her home and that would be hard on everybody.  Of course, we could just visit the country without actually meeting her too, but I'm not sure whether that would make the kids ok with not going later or just make them more excited to go when we get Z.  Ah well, we have time to think it over.  Besides, D doesn't even want to take that trip, so my thinking and "planning" could be all for naught....

Care Package

I guess I haven't updated in a while.  I've been trying not to because there's been some major frustration, but I forgot to update about the good stuff too!

Our agency emailed me just after Thanksgiving with updated pictures and updated measurements for Z!  It came on the perfect day because I started that day feeling depressed that things were dragging on for so long and that helped put things into perspective for me.  I can't post pictures publicly, but she looked absolutely beautiful to me!  Her hair was put up a little differently, but she had longer hair!  I was so worried that they would chop it off to make things easier, but it's longer and beautiful.  Her complexion is perfect and she looks VERY healthy!  She also seemed like she was looking at the specific people rather than openly gazing off into the distance, which is also very encouraging.  In that email, they also told us to start putting together a care package to send to her.  They gave suggestions for what to include such as clothes, a blanket, a toy with our voices recorded (hello, Build-A-Bear!), a disposable camera, small gifts for the caregivers such as chapstick, and letters and pictures drawn by the kids.  I must say, I have really enjoyed getting everything together!  This process has been therapeutic actually.  I emailed our letters (one for Z and one for her caregivers) yesterday and they had already emailed translations back that evening!  Talk about fast!!  So, this morning I am printing out the newly translated letters, we will all sign them and I will mail it today.  I hope it gets there by Christmas because I included a Christmas outfit for Z.  Though, I'm not really sure if they celebrate Christmas....does Z know anything about it?  I'm not sure.  Either way, she'll have a pretty new dress!

A quick update on the frustrating part.  My mom had been getting our local police clearances for us.  They needed to be notarized, then state certified before the agency could get them authenticated and sent to Crescent Moon.  The state rejected the forms 2 different times because of issues with the notary!  Once the notary "signed over the seal" and the other time it didn't have a "statement of acknowledgement".  The most frustrating part was that when we called the state department, they were rude and not at all helpful!  Mom finally got the 3rd forms the other day and she said the notary looks great!  They should already be at the state.  Hopefully this time they will certify them and with any luck, they will do it quickly!  Once these forms get to Crescent Moon, we will get our LOA and be well on our way to meeting Z!!  :-D

Hoping this forward momentum is real and not just wishful thinking and hoping it continues!
-V

More Documents

Just a quick update because it's past my bedtime and tomorrow morning is going to be our first day back to normal after a 2 week vacation so it's going to be rough enough without me being exhausted on top of everything else.

I got an email 2 days ago (I can't believe I put off updating this for that long!) that Crescent Moon is requesting a local police clearance from the US.  The agency is checking on more specifics as to whether it matters if it's from our home towns or whether it needs to be from the city we were living in just before we moved to Germany.  Frankly, I'm not sure why Crescent Moon needs anything at all because they are all outdated and we went to a LOT of work and expense to provide them with German police clearances!  I'm guessing they have a checklist and a German police clearance won't let them check the little box next to US police clearance or something equally dumb.  I'm not actually all that frustrated that Crescent Moon wants this.  I've sort of reached a point of being almost numb.  You want more paperwork?  Fine, here you go.  But, I am getting incredibly frustrated at knowing that something needs done, but not knowing exactly WHAT needs done so that I can work on getting someone to help me get it done!  If there's one thing that stresses me out more than anything, it's that!  When something needs done, I want to get it done ASAP, not wait around for someone to eventually figure out what exactly that thing is while we're powerless to actually act on it yet!  And the worst thing is that I can't call them until tomorrow night (day there) because they've both had the weekend off.  When I call, I get great answers and reassurance and it's all great, but emails go  vaguely answered and then take another day or 2 to get a clearer response, etc.  I guess this just goes along with the rest of our adoption process so far....taking as long as it possibly can and having several delays along the way.  :-\

In Process

First, I must say that this morning we were blessed to see a beautiful rainbow!  I know, that doesn't sound like something so special because they happen "all the time", right?  Well, for some reason, not in Germany.  I often joke that God doesn't love Germany because despite the perfect weather conditions for rainbows, they just don't happen.  This morning was the second one we've seen while living here.  It's been 2 and a half years!  2 rainbows!  That's just not right.  But, the 2 we have seen have been the biggest, brightest rainbows imaginable so I guess that kind of makes up for their rarity.  The one this morning also had the distinction of being the closest rainbow I have ever seen.  From our house, we could see both ends.  One end landed on the Autobahn visible from our house.  The other end landed over the city.  There are some trees that block the exact place it "landed", but it was the closest part of the city just past those trees.  I always thought rainbows made complete circles far away and they only looked like the landed on the horizon, but today's rainbow proved that wrong.  It clearly landed in specific places!  I took plenty of pictures to prove I wasn't just bleary-eyed!  Anyways, all that to say that the day started off on an amazing note, but it was about to get even better!!

When I got back from dropping D & L off at their respective schools, I checked my email for a bit.  I was expecting mostly the usual - facebook notifications, pinterest notifications, and a few of the emails I subscribe to.  Those never fail to disappoint me.  However, I found an unexpected surprise.  Our agency had sent us an email.  The first words were "Great news!"  Sweet!!  Crescent Moon changed our status from "To Be Processed" to "In Process".  Now, I'm not exactly sure what that really means.  But, it's obviously "great news", so I'll take it!!  The email went on to say that we should go ahead and start filling out our I800 and email a copy for the agency to review before we actually send it in.  That's our next step, so we're moving very quickly now!!  She also said we should be seeing our Letter of Acceptance within the next 30 days.  We were told that could take 3 months, so something is actually going QUICKER than expected!  With everything I had read on blogs and various sites, it looked like Crescent Moon was about as efficient as a penguin trying to run a marathon, but maybe we have found a special grace with them.  God is good!!

Hopefully once we receive our actual LOA, the agency will be able to give us a better estimate of when we will be able to travel.  I will continue to keep you posted.  :-)

LID

I just got an email from our agency.  Our LID is September 7th!  I'm not sure what happened that they weren't told that before, but at least we have it now.  According to my checklist, the next thing is that we receive a "Letter of Acceptance".  I'm not sure if that comes to us or goes to our agency or both.  The list I have says that can take anywhere from 1-2 months to get.  After that, we file our I-800 with the US government.  That is the application for Z to be found eligible to be adopted.  I *think* that's the last major thing that we have to do.  All of the other steps are between governments and don't directly involve us.  Well, at the very end of the process, we will have to go about applying for a travel visa to travel to Crescent Moon, but by that point the excitement will override any hassle.  :-)

-V

Waiting...

It's been a while since I've posted, so I figured I would update you.  Unfortunately, there isn't as much to update as I would like, but that just seems to be the case with every step in this process so I'm starting to get used to it.  :-\

Our Dossier was signed for and accepted on September 4th in Crescent Moon.  I'm not exactly sure what's been happening since then.  I know at some point, they needed to translate it, so maybe that's what's causing the delay.  At any rate, they were supposed to review it and give us a "Log-in Date" (LID).  This date is supremely important to those doing a standard adoption because it's basically your number in line and lets you know about how much longer you need to wait.  Since we're doing everything backwards, it really isn't that important to us.  Well, that isn't true.  It will still be important and will probably be their way to find our paperwork or something, but it has no other meaning to us.  We have already been matched with our child, so there's no wondering when that will happen, etc.

I was getting freaked out because we hadn't heard anything from our agency and I had emailed them over a week ago and gotten no response.  I was worried something bad had happened and they were afraid to tell me.  It had been a long, stressful day and I had a headache so I had D call the agency to see what was going on.  That's when he learned about it being signed for on the 4th.  Our agency also told him that it was the point when we should've gotten our LID, so they were going to call their contact in Crescent Moon, Uncle Z, to have him follow up on that if they didn't hear anything by that night.  Well, that was 2 nights ago.  I'm guessing they are thrown off by half of the documents being authenticated in the US and the other half being authenticated in Germany.  I am hoping that Uncle Z finds out something soon because I'm anxious to know that our Dossier is approved!

As always, I will keep you posted!

-V

And there was much rejoicing!!!

This morning, L, N, & I went back to Frankfurt to pick up our documents from the embassy.  Knowing where to go helped a lot!  After another failed try, the lady finally explained that I needed a copy of every page even if they were the same.  I guess I'm upset that she told me last week that if there were duplicates I only needed one, but at the same time I wouldn't have had enough money for that many copies anyways.  It was quite expensive, but I was armed with a TON of change, so it barely made a dent!  The worst part was that since I obviously needed to make a ton of copies, some people who only needed to make a few felt they were justified in rudely cutting in line and using my money to make their copies.  Most of them asked politely and a few even offered to pay for their copies, but there was 1 guy in particular who at first asked to make just 2 copies, then came back and jumped into make at least 5 more.  He didn't ask the second time and he never bothered to even think that 7 copies are more than just chump change on that machine!  But, in the end, I got all the copies I needed and was able to leave with all of our documents properly authenticated!!  420 Euros later, that is.  I'm still in shock over how expensive this entire process has been, but it will be worth it.

When we got home, we picked up DJ and wasted no time in going to mail them.  (I already had my box labelled and ready to go last night so all I had to do was put the documents in and seal the last side!)  Well, ok we wasted a lot of time.  Finding a good post office here is surprisingly difficult.  I needed it to be fast, insured, and traceable.  This meant regular Deutsche Post wouldn't do.  I would need to use DHL.  There are a few of those scattered around, but the only ones I know of have next to no parking available and I was SO not in the mood to hunt for more parking after driving to Frankfurt again!  I used our GPS to try to pick one that seemed like it would have decent parking available.  Boy, was I wrong!!  When we drove by, I don't even think that was a post office at all!  So, I went a different route and decided to try my luck on a tiny little UPS sign that I see on my way to the custom's office, which I visit rather frequently.  And what luck we had!!  It was a bit of a drive, but we found a huge UPS warehouse/sorting center with a small office for customers and they even had 3 parking spaces!  (See how hard parking is to come by??  I was excited by 3 spaces!  Sad, huh....)  I went in expecting really expensive shipping that probably wouldn't be as quick as I would like.  It is guaranteed to get to our agency by 10:30 on Wednesday, which is great!!  (Time change really works for us in that instance)  It was 58 Euros, but that's still a lot cheaper than the prices I found on DHL's website and I don't know how quickly they were going to get there.  All in all, I was incredibly excited!

Everything's moving along and it looks like our documents should make it to Crescent Moon before our deadline on September 13th!  Yay!!  Though, I did hate having to try to explain to L that we still have to wait a bit more before we can get Z.  She was skipping along as we left the embassy thinking we were literally going to go pick her up already.  It's going to be a great day when I can finally tell her (& DJ) that we are, in fact, on our way!!

German Authentication - DONE! Crescent Moon Authentication - In Progress!!

D got back yesterday evening with the documents.  It was a rough trip all around.  He said the van was acting up quite a bit again.  He had to pull over 3 times on the way there to restart the engine because the transmission kept shifting out of 4th and the check engine light would come on.  Then, when he finally got there, they told him it would cost twice as much as it should have cost!  This is because there were 2 notarizations and 2 certifications per document and both had to be Authenticated.  One of those was the one they refused to Authenticate before, mind you.  Oh, it's a good thing he went and not me because I might have blown a gasket about that!  So, 60 Euros became 120 Euros.  He didn't have quite that much cash, so he had to visit an ATM.  The good news is that they were already done Authenticating by the time he was back from getting more cash.  At least something went smoothly with this government!  ;-)  On his way home, the exit that he needed was blocked off and he had to take a long detour through Köln, which is never fun.  But, he eventually made it home!!  :-D

He had a work trip that he leaves for today at 4 and will be gone for the next day or 2.  I didn't want to wait that long, so I went this morning.  After I dropped DJ off at school, I took L & N to Frankfurt.  The drive there was uneventful and smooth, which is always good!  As is typical around here, parking was scarce.  We actually ended up parking at a University Clinic 0.7 km away.  It may have been the most run-down parking garage I have ever seen!  It looked like they just ran out of money about half-way through and stopped.  But, it worked.  I had to carry N in his heavy stroller up far too many stairs, but at least I can check "weight training" off the list for today.  ;-)  L did surprisingly well walking to the embassy!  Usually she hates to walk, but this time she was twirling and skipping along almost faster than I could keep up.

I don't know why, but for some reason, I was expecting an embassy with many different offices to navigate and a decent amount of people, but not many where I needed to be.  I couldn't have been more wrong.  For the embassy being fairly large and it serving many regions of Germany, it seemed to me that they just liked to be crowded.  They had 1 room.  ONE!  It was not much larger than our living room.  Along one wall, they had 6 windows labelled with their respective purposes (2 for Visas) and then they had a few chairs lining 2 of the remaining 3 walls.  They also had a photo booth for passport photos and a copy machine.  Nearly everybody had tickets with numbers on them.  I could not for the life of me figure out where they got them!  I went to window 1, the Kasse (cashier), figuring maybe he could offer me a ticket and perhaps explain why there was nobody at window 4, which I needed.  He simply told me to go wait there and his colleague was on her way.  Seemed reasonable enough to me.  When I had walked in, there was nobody anywhere near that window, but now there were 2 people waiting.  I got in line and waited with them.  2 more people joined us.  A long time passed.  I'm not really sure how much because I was doing everything in my power not to worry about it, so I refused to look at a clock or my watch.  The guy behind me decided to strike up a conversation in German, which I could carry on for a little while.  Eventually, he realized that I'm more comfortable with English, which he also knew quite well.  And he's Chinese, so he's at least trilingual.  People like that amaze me because I get languages so muddled up in my brain!  But, he was surprised that I wanted to adopt when I already had children.  He commented about how strange that was when in China families are still permitted only 1 child.  I thought that was changed quite a while ago, but apparently nobody bothered to tell citizens that.  But, it was nice to have someone to talk to and it really helped pass the time.

Eventually, the lady came to the desk and helped the first 2 people rather quickly.  I was thinking I could just drop everything off and tell her we wanted to expedite them and that would be that.  Well, she was also surprised we were adopting.  REALLY surprised.  Honestly, I might be the first person she's ever seen to do that since Germans can't adopt from China and I'm supposedly not supposed to be able to either.  She wanted me to write the name of the child and all of that information, which I gladly did, but I wonder what would've happened if I didn't know yet.  Really, it's highly unusual that we already know that too.  Our adoption is so atypical it's not even funny!!  Anyways, after I added that information for her, she asked where my copies were.  On the website it mentioned needing copies, but I had forgotten and assumed those were only for my records since they would have the originals so I didn't think it was important.  So, she sent me to the 20 cents/copy machine.  *sigh*  I usually carry around a decent amount of change, but I try not to ever have too much.  I also think that we had close to 100 sheets of paper, which I was definitely NOT copying all of!  Many of them were duplicates (or REALLY close to it!) so I copied the fronts of each different form along with the main German Authentication from 1 of them.  (There are actually 2 different ones since the signatures from our 2 batches were different, but I didn't think that was important)  She said that wasn't good enough.  I needed copies of the notaries and the certification as well.  I used my last coin, which was a 2 Euro.  Most of those are the same, but I tried to get each unique instance.  Not good enough.  She also needed a copy of my passport and my German Visa.  Those were fine.  By this point, I was completely out of money!  All the while, N was getting horribly bored and cranky!  Luckily, L was entertained the entire time by the photo booth.  She told me that I still needed more copies!  I have no idea what of because I really can only think of 2 at most that are different, but she acted like I had missed 10 pages or something!  She kept telling me to check more carefully.  I explained that I didn't know what else she needed, but that I was completely out of money.  She said there was nothing she could do and that she couldn't help me.  I asked her to make the necessary copies and I could just pay her for them, but she explained that she was too busy and didn't have time to make copies.  I tried asking what the copies were even for, but she didn't answer.  She just stuck with the fact that she couldn't help me.  Finally, I couldn't take it any more and I lost it.  I just started crying and trying to explain that I drove so far to be there and this was the only day I could come and that these needed to be in China very soon and I didn't have time to make this trip again, etc.  She kept telling me to please not cry, but I couldn't stop.  Finally she said there was another way.  She could go ahead and Authenticate them and I could just make the copies when I picked them up and that would give me time to get more coins.  Ugh!  Why did I have to cry for her to tell me that?!?  I'm still beyond embarrassed that I did that.  I didn't want to create a scene or seem manipulative, but I just couldn't handle any more stress!  So, our documents will be ready to pick up on Monday.  I ended up not messing with getting them done quicker, because I won't be able to pick them up until Monday at the earliest anyways.  But I will be armed with tons of coins this time around!  ;-)

On the way home, our exit was blocked and the GPS stubbornly kept trying to direct me to that route even after I followed the detour signs.  Eventually I got far enough away that it recalculated correctly, but that cost us quite a bit of time and frustration!  It also had some REALLY rough downshifts as I was trying to pass a slower semi with some fast cars on my tail.  That was "f.u.n.".... NOT!  I am very tempted to drive the van back and forth on the Autobahn tomorrow morning in the hopes that it freaks out again so I can go to the mechanic and let him know we aren't crazy!  But, 1 thing at a time.... once I mail our Dossier next week, he'd better be ready because he's on my list.  ;-)

So, all in all, a gloriously productive past few days, but oh so stressful at the same time.  It's strange because despite the outward stress (and believe me, we've had the lion's share this week!), I'm still maintaining an inward calm and peace.  Obviously, I'm overjoyed that we're finally at this point as well, but that's a bit buried by all of the stress and hiccups that we keep encountering.  Satan may be trying to thwart us, but he will not succeed!  The peace that God has given my goes much deeper than circumstances.  God has been providing for us in amazing ways that blow our minds if we even stop to think about them for a few seconds. And that's what it's all about!!  :-D

Certification - DONE!! Authentication - In Progress

Yesterday I had called the notary to see if our documents were ready yet and they said that it would be either today or tomorrow.  I had been told on Friday that it would be Monday or Tuesday.  :-\  I explained that D had already taken today off work to drive them to Köln, so we really needed them ASAP!  The lady said the certification office was very busy and there wasn't anything they could do but that she would know by 9:30 today and that I should call at 9:45 to talk to her.  On my way home from dropping DJ & L off at school, I really felt a calm that they would be in this morning.  I called at 9:48 and someone else answered the phone.  All she knew was that the documents weren't there and she had no idea when they might show up.  Well, my bubble of hope popped.  I started cleaning the desk to keep my head distracted from my thoughts because it looked hopeless.  D  took today off, but he has work trips for basically the next week.  I can maybe handle going to the Crescent Moon embassy by myself in the morning, but Köln is too far away to get there & back in the morning and DJ can't miss school. The thought of having to wait a whole week because of a 1 day delay was just too much for me to handle!  I even made D try to call the certification place a couple of times to see if they could hurry up.  They never answered.  After about 45 minutes, my phone rang.  It was the lady who knew what she was doing from the Notar.  She said our documents were ready to pick up!  She knew how important this was and even offered to stay in the office over her lunch break if we needed her to.  Talk about sweet!!  That's seriously unheard of here in Germany!  D was able to get them before noon, so she still got to enjoy her lunch break.  D took the documents to the Federal Office in Köln and will hopefully have no problems getting them Authenticated for us today.  I will update again when he gets home.  :-)

Notary - DONE!

Since I had already met with our Dr. at the notary, the only 2 signatures remaining were both employees at D's work.  It was very hard for me to let him handle that as tactfully as he did.  But, as of yesterday, both of them had stopped by the notary for us!  Yay!!  Now I need to make them some brownies or something!  ;-)  I called the notary this morning and they said that hopefully they will all be certified by Monday, but it should be no later than Tuesday.  I really hope they are right!  I called D and he is going to try to take Tuesday off work so he can drive to Köln and try to get the authenticated right then.  Considering it's just a corner folded down and stapled to their form then a stamp over the corner, I wouldn't imagine it would take that long for them to do it.  If all goes well with them, I might head to the Crescent Moon embassy Wednesday morning to get the final authentication.  I will probably pay a bit more to have the 2-day service, but not pay more for same day service.  I'm assuming "same day" means I would have to wait until the last minute they are open that day rather than just waiting an hour or so and I just don't have that much time in the mornings.  As it is, I'm a bit nervous about the prospect of driving there while DJ & L are in school because if there are many delays, that could create a HUGE problem when I'm not able to pick them up in time.  Once we get those back, we will ship them back to our placing agency via the fastest mail option we can reasonably afford.  If all goes well, we should hopefully be able to get everything there in time for them to forward them to Crescent Moon before the deadline of September 13th.  You know, when we started this process, I was determined to be the family who does everything in record time because I would fill out forms and return them without ever setting them down and then we wouldn't have to wait for anything.  HA!!  Turns out, me doing everything as quickly as I can doesn't amount to much when I still have to wait on lots of others.  Though God is really helping me to deal with the waiting much better than I was even a few weeks ago, so that's good!!

Except for the dream I had last night.... In my dream, there was a portion of our documents that also had to be authenticated in London.  For some reason, I held onto them while we were waiting on local people to visit the notary.  In my dream, I finally realized that I should've mailed those to London as soon as I had them so they could be there and back by the time I finally got the local authentication done.  So, I panicked big time because not only were we going to have to drive local documents to Köln, but now I was going to also have to drive other documents all the way to London to be authenticated there!  It sounds silly, but it was like the world was crashing down in my dream because there was no way I could possibly drive to London and I no longer had time to wait for them if I mailed them now.  In real life, we have nothing to do with London but it's still not a good feeling to wake up after stressing all night like that!  Luckily, the good news from the notary trumps that ridiculous dream!  :-)

1 hurdle overcome

I guess I forgot to post the other day.  Well, the letter had mentioned an option of a "Gesundheitsamt", which is basically the overseers for all of the Doctors in town.  I was hoping they would have signatures on file to they could verify that it was our Dr's signature without having to interrupt his schedule.  So, I did what I still hate to do more than just about anything else in the world....I loaded all 3 kids up and away we went!  (While they typically do much better than I expect, I still hate the uncertainty of waiting, especially in a country that thinks a 20 minute wait to check out at the grocery store is "normal"!)  With the aid of our trusty GPS, we ventured into a new area of town that had remarkably wide roads.  That instantly brightened my mood.  (It's the little things in life....)  We were able to find a pretty good parking spot and the kids did relatively well, especially considering the situation.  We were told to go to the 3rd floor to a small office.  The office was located in the middle of a LONG narrow corridor that might have been the most bleak, depressing hallway ever!  It was dark and hot and LOUD!  The kids, unfortunately, are not exceptionally good with the concept of "quiet".  I tried to turn whispering into a game but, let's face it, the echos of their regular (loud!) talking voices and footsteps were just far too appealing.  The lady I spoke with seemed to understand exactly what I needed and gave the impression that this was a reasonable thing to ask of them and that it should be only a matter of a few minutes.  Well, after 45 minutes of various comings and goings of 4 different people who all insisted on giving us their best "German stares", they all finally came out and surrounded us.  Then 1 guy asked me what exactly I wanted.  Never a good sign.  I explained again that I needed our Dr's signature verified or notarized.  He talked to the others in German for a while and one of the other ladies told me that they did not have his signature on file, so they wouldn't be able to help me.  I would HAVE to get the Dr. to go to a Notar in person and that was my only option.  Ugh!  Such a pain!

I felt terrible even asking him to do that but everyone made it clear that there was no other option, so I called and explained the situation to him.  He was not upset with me, but thought the situation was absurd!  He had no problems laughing about the ridiculousness of their request.  Luckily, he was really sweet and was willing to do it "just for us", he said.  He actually told me that the reason he was willing to go for us was because he wanted "one more in Heaven".  :-)  It was funny though, because he asked me if he would need to bring his mom with him so that she could verify that he was who he said he was!  lol!!  I'm so glad he's such a great-natured person!  We went to meet him there an hour ago.  He had a very small window because he had phone calls and house visits to make.  (Yes, a Doctor that still makes house visits every day!  I told you he was awesome!!)  The Notar's office was locked when it was supposed to be open.  We waited and kept ringing the bell outside the door that is supposed to ring inside, but nothing.  Finally the Dr. had the idea to go downstairs (the office is on the 1st floor upstairs) and see if the phone number was on the front door.  Luckily, it was!  When he called, a lady answered and said that of course they were open!  She had forgotten to unlock the door!!  Yikes!  If he hadn't called, who knows if they ever would have noticed that and he would have had to leave to go back to work without getting to meet the Notar.  I hate to even think about that!!

Unfortunately, all the craziness rubbed off on DJ & L (N was sleeping) and while we were waiting, they decided that they needed to run up and down the stairs.  These are marble stairs in a very small sterile environment, so it was LOUD!  Then when we finally got inside, they decided that they needed to fight with each other.  DJ kept taking away L's toys and holding them an arms length from her while she freaked out.  L decided that it was a good idea to climb on the chairs in the least safe way possible.  They were so bad, the Notar actually asked me if we were certain that we wanted another child.  I HATE that question.  A lot!  Especially when it's completely reasonable to ask it.  *sigh*  At any rate, that notarization for those forms is done and they will also get them certified for us. That just leaves the proof of employment letter from D's work and there are 2 signatures on that letter.  Both of the people said they were willing to go to the Notar's, but they didn't say when.  I hope they go in some time this week so we can get these certified documents to the German Federal Office to be authenticated.  We really need to get everything to the Crescent Moon embassy ASAP so they can be on their way to our agency in the states, then sent on to Crescent Moon before September 13th.  No pressure or anything.... ;-)

Dream

Last night, I had a wonderful dream!  I dreamt that D&I finally got Z.  There was a lady who worked at a house that sort of doubled as day-care/school and orphanage, but it was a bit nicer than you would expect of such a place in Crescent Moon.  I had been explaining to her several of the obstacles we had encountered and she sympathized with me and we were talking about how the system itself is in need of some improvement.  As we were talking about ways we felt would improve the system, I expressed special sorrow for those orphans who have heart problems who need medical help ASAP.  (Is advocacy in my future?  Perhaps...)  She also showed me around the facilities and she had long cords that resembled the old coil telephone cords, but much longer.  She said that she would knot these up a special way and then paint the child's name on them in various colors so that when it was unknotted, it would simply have a unique color pattern that had a deeper meaning than it appeared to the untrained eye.  She explained that she started doing this for each child when they got their first baths in the facility because they were often scared and having such a special thing to look at that was uniquely theirs really brought them comfort.  After that bath, the coils would be unknotted and then hung over their bed to identify it in a subtle way.  I guess it doesn't sound very special when I write it out, but in the dream it was the coolest, sweetest idea I had heard in a long time!  She had even made some for DJ, L, & N for me since I told her how much I loved the idea.  She really was such a sweet lady!!

After showing me around and talking for a long while, she told me that it was time to go meet Z.  She had been in kindergarten and the class would be getting over any minute, so we headed over there.  Several kids filed out of the room and I could feel my anticipation mounting.  At last, I saw Z slowly come out of the room.  I noticed that her eyes seemed very bright.  They were beautiful big brown eyes.  She seemed like she had some difficulty seeing well, but she could clearly see some.  The lady who I had been with went and took her by the hand which really reassured Z.  She led Z up some stairs to where I was and she introduced me, but didn't tell her yet that I was adopting her.  I remember her politely shaking my hand with her left hand instead of her right.  Not surprisingly, she melted my heart almost instantly.  The lady, Z, & I went over to a quiet area and just talked.  The lady was asking her about her day and Z's comfort level seemed to indicate that this was a daily routine for them.  I was amazed that Z seemed to know quite a bit of English and spoke it perfectly.  After a while, the lady somehow introduced the concept of "mom" into the conversation.  Z got a little sad and looked away with her head down because it was a foreign concept to her, but one she knew she wanted.  The lady told her that I had come here to be her mom from now on.  Z's face brightened up and she looked at me with anticipation and said, "Mom?"  That was the moment my heart became a puddle of goo....

I took the lady aside the next time I got an opportunity and told her that as much as I loved Z and getting to be a part of her life, I was worried that I was violating some laws because we had not yet submitted our I-800, which is the petition for Z to be found eligible to be adopted.  She explained that it wasn't really a vital part of the process, but that it's more of a "strong suggestion".  She said that there was another thing we could do instead.  (I can't remember what, but it somehow involved Jamaica)  She said we could have 14 days to get that completed, which should be plenty of time.  Then, after that 14 days, we would not have to worry about the adoption falling apart any longer.

The next thing in my dream, Z & I were walking hand-in-hand along with D through various situations - church, a walk, playground, meeting new people, etc.  She had a blue box/car that seemed very precious to her that she sometimes wanted to be in, but sometimes she was content to just have it near her.  We were so busy just enjoying the special time that we weren't taking many pictures and I remember feeling really bad that we hadn't taken enough pictures of her old life so that she could see them when she got older if she wanted to know more about this time of her life.  She was amazingly open with D & me, but very shy around new people.  Often people that we knew, especially those who prayed for & followed along on our adoption journey, would be so excited to finally meet her that they would approach her a bit too quickly or touch her shoulder or something innocent for them, but a bit much for her.  I remember telling her that these were friends who just didn't understand that they made her feel uncomfortable and that they only meant to make her feel welcome and loved.  She seemed much better after I explained that.  In particular, I remember introducing her to "Mr. Cooper".  Oddly enough, I don't remember ever introducing DJ, L, or N to her.  Perhaps we were waiting until after the 14 days was over so we didn't have to take their new sister away from them.

Frustration

They tried to deliver our documents yesterday morning, but they required 162 Euros cash to deliver.  I'm not a big cash person over here.  Needless to say, I didn't have it.  The lady gave me a slip to pick it up at the main post office.  We went while we were out around 3:30 and the guy said it wasn't there yet, so I would have to come back the next day.  Things like this are SO much easier without 3 small children in tow!  D and I were originally going to stop by the post office on our way to church group tonight since it's right on the way.  In typical "me" fashion, I couldn't stop worrying about why it was 162 Euros.  We had 24 documents and they each cost 10 Euros to Authenticate.  I was worried they lost some or that they were mailing them in 2 shipments for some reason.  I was trying not to think there was even a possibility of them not authenticating some of them because we had followed all of the necessary steps.  I attempted to call them to ask why it was that amount, but the person I called spoke NO English and insisted that nobody there did either.  This was not the kind of conversation that would be easy in English, so there was no change in German.  Ugh!!  So, knowing that I would have no rest until I had the documents in hand, I took all 3 kids to the post office to pick them up.  Fortunately, they were not busy!  We waited less than a minute and the lady was very friendly.  She couldn't fathom why the documents were so expensive, but I don't really blame her there!  ;-)  Aside from L wanting to pick up every card they had (they apparently also sell cards there), the kids were very well behaved!  Early morning trips are always best for us.

Once we got back to the van, I just had to open up the package to see what was going on.  I was hoping to find an invoice for the remaining amount to be paid via computer.  What I found was that they had authenticated 16 of our documents.  They had taken it upon themselves to slap a giant sticker on the copies of our passports that say that the original was not verified to be an official document or some-such nonsense.  I'm not thrilled about that.  It had better not cause us problems because the Notar very much did verify them!  The worst part is the letter they included with the remaining 8 documents.... Apparently, they cannot authenticate documents unless ALL signatures have been verified.  Yup, that again.  The letter didn't translate perfectly, but from what I can tell, they even say that my little "testimony" that the signatures are valid is completely unrelated and irrelevant.  The letter says that if we cannot have the signature of our Dr. verified in person that we can bring that directly to them, but it doesn't say how that will make a difference.  It implies that the letters from D's employer and the guardianship forms will have to be completely redone because I somehow "ruined" them by certifying that the signatures were valid.  I'm so confused because I did the same thing to the Dr. form and they didn't seem to mind that.  I'm going to have to try to call a different number and see if I can get ahold of the guy who speaks English again.  He was really helpful and maybe I explain just how impossible it is to get those people to go to the Notar and how important, yet not important, this stamp is.  It won't mean much except to let us get the Authentication from Crescent Moon.  Beyond that, it's worthless.  UGH, this is SUCH a pain!!

And, to top off my emotional struggles, L had spent the entire drive to the post office talking in as great of detail as she can imagine about our trip to Crescent Moon to go get Z.  She was convinced that after we got this thing from the post office, that we could go buy plane tickets tomorrow and go get Z.  She was telling me all about these stairs that we were going to have to walk up and down to get to her and how happy she was going to be to see her little sister, etc.  I was having to hold back tears during our 10 minute drive and then seeing the forms not done....well, let's just say that I'm having a rough day now.  I'm not sure how to fix this or how long this is going to set us back now.  I'm trying to stay as optimistic as I can, but I feel like German Bureaucracy just sucks the life out of me.  I am hoping for good news when I call, but we'll see....

Packet mailed!

I mailed our documents to Köln this morning!  Mail here is really quick, so hopefully they receive it tomorrow and can begin working on authenticating all 24 documents!  I hope someone is in the mood for quick tedious work!  lol!!!

In other news, the mechanics can't find anything wrong with our van.  Story of my life when it comes to cars.... I hope it was just a strange glitch and not a sign of trouble to come.  Though, they can't explain why it seems to drag at higher speeds.  D is going to pick it up tomorrow on his way back to church and he will see how it handles then.  Maybe being taken apart and looked at will be enough to get the transmission to behave again.  ;-)  If not, maybe it will at least have the courtesy to misbehave when they are open and when I have time to drive it there!  Still, it will be nice to have our van back again.  They gave us an old Peugeot to drive in the meantime and it was a bit cramped.  Though, DJ did enjoy getting to sit in the front seat!  (It's legal here "if there's not room in the back" and the car had a special switch for me to turn his airbag off)  It also handled pretty rough when under 50 km/h (anywhere in town) and couldn't go above 110, so the Autobahn was a nightmare too!  And it lacks A/C, but fortunately that isn't much of an issue since it's less than warm here anyways.  :-P

Failed expectations

I forgot to update the other day.  The notary came through and I was able to pick up our certified copies of our passports about an hour after my last post.  To say I was impressed is an understatement!  It's Monday and we still have no word about our translations, unfortunately.  I was really hoping to be able to get them today and send them to Koln this afternoon!  This is the last week of Kindergarten for DJ (ever!!) and L.  After that, we have 3 weeks of "summer break".  This is all well and good, except that I still have to make a trip to the embassy in Frankfurt for the final Authentication.  I was REALLY expecting to be able to do that one morning while they were in school.  Taking N to an embassy for a lengthy legal process didn't rank high on "fun factor", but taking all 3?  Well, that's almost as pleasant as a root canal..... at least they give you pain meds for the root canal!  ;-)  It looks like D might have to take the morning/day off of work to come with us just to help with them.  To be fair, when we went to the US Embassy, they did much better than expected but kids and endless bureaucracy just don't mix and this time we will be adding a potential language barrier.  Heck, I might just see if I can leave them home with D while I go by myself!

Speaking of getting to the embassy, our van is having some issues.  D said when he was driving it home from church Thursday night, it shifted really rough and the check engine light came on.  The light has gone away and it now drives ok, except that we seem to have "lost" our top gear.  In the US, this wouldn't be a problem.  Here with the Autobahn, though, it is.  120 km/h is our top speed without really pushing the rpms higher than we want.  (In case you're curious, that's 75 mph)  Typing that makes me a little glad to have such a problem.  In the US if we couldn't make it over 75 mph, we would hardly notice!  Here, we have to stay close to home where there are speed limits (100 and 130 mainly).  If we venture into the "fun" territory, we're liable to get rear-ended if we try to pass anybody and we don't want to be stuck behind a semi who can only go 90.  Oh, and then there's that thing about not wanting the problem to get worse.  The frustrating thing is that the transmission has been on my worry list since the day we brought the van home last September.  I'm going to take it to the place we bought it tomorrow for them to take a look at it and see if they can find (and fix!) the problem.  I really hope it's something simple like a sensor or something and not the whole transmission!  I also hope they don't expect us to pay much for it since we told them about our concerns immediately after we brought it home.  I don't mind paying some, but we'll see what happens.....

In other "news"..... my expectations were really put into place this weekend.  For some bizarre reason, I was thinking/hoping that we would be able to travel in around 2-3 months.  Our placing agency would never give me even a rough estimate, probably because they cannot guarantee anything and didn't want to get my hopes up.  I just wanted a general guess so I could know whether or not we might be able to go to Disney for L's birthday or whether I can make it to my BFF's wedding and tentatively figure out who might be able to watch the kids for us while we go to Crescent Moon.  They finally told me that once our Dossier makes it to Crescent Moon, it will likely still be 4-6 months before we travel because they have to translate and review it first, then we have to do our I-800, etc.  That was not a good thing to read.  I have assumed we were going to be travelling around September pretty much this entire time.  That was my initial thought and I got some vague confirmation from Dr. A and one of the people at our placing agency (WAY back before our home study dilemma, of course)  It had never occurred to me that we might not get to travel this fiscal year (which ends Halloween) or worse, that we may not be able to bring Z home for Christmas!  I am hoping that things go much quicker than expected, of course.  Maybe we can get her over Christmas break.  That would save a lot of D's vacation time and we would have plenty of family available to help watch the kids for us.  And, what better Christmas present for any of us?!  I will say this though....I do NOT want to wait until her 5th birthday at the end of February to get her!  That is just TOO far away!  I am sure that we'll start to have a better guesstimate of when we'll get to travel as we get closer to that day.  I just wish we could know now!  I'm trying really hard to just let it go and trust that God knows when He wants us to get her.  He seems to be delaying things pretty often, so there must be a reason.  

Miracles DO happen!!

This morning, I finally got the email I have been anticipating for some time now.  Our placing agency emailed me that they have received their copy of our I-800A Approval!!!  YAY!!!!  We're past the major hurdle and everything else *should* be smooth sailing!  :-D

Our next step now is to mail all of our authenticated documents to the agency so they can translate them and forward them to Crescent Moon!  We have most of our documents in hand, but we are still waiting on our certified translations of our local police reports to be "state" certified.  (Certifying already certified documents doesn't really make sense to me, but when does bureaucracy ever make sense!  lol!)  I keep thinking those should get here any day, but I've been thinking that for a week now.  :-\  I also noticed that the certified copies of our passports were missing from the rest of our stack of documents, so I called the notary and they found them and said they will TRY to have them done today.  I'm assuming I will get them Monday or Tuesday, but either way it won't be long.  Once we finally get those 2 things, we will be able to forward a HUGE stack of documents (an envelope is impossible and at this rate, our box might not be big enough either!) to Koln for them to be Authenticated by Germany.  I need to call them this afternoon and see how long they are expecting that to take.  The last time I talked to them, they said it would only take 2-3 days plus mail time, which isn't bad at all in Germany.  If that's no longer the case, I might ask about the option of driving the documents there to be done the same day.  D says that's a terrible option because Koln is at least 3-4 hours away, but the sooner those get done, the sooner we can get Z!!  Once Koln does its thing, we then take the documents to the Crescent Moon embassy in Frankfurt in person!  That will be done in person and then we carefully entrust our documents to the certified mail to be taken back to the placing agency.  I still haven't figured out which carrier to use for that.  Probably FedEx since that's what everyone seems to use stateside, but their presence is meager at best over here, so I might go with DHL.  I still have a little time to figure that out though!  ;-)

On a less technical note, L has REALLY been wanting Z to be here lately!  When we went to pick up our documents, I tried to explain that these documents were things that we needed before we could get Z.  L interpreted that as "We are going to pick up some documents, then get on an airplane and get Z".  I did say many times that we would still have to wait before we could go get her, but L didn't pay attention to that part.  When we came home after getting those papers, she broke down crying.  She said she was just going to wait in the van until it was time to go to the airport.  She spent the rest of that day sulking and crying about.  At bedtime, she nearly cried herself to sleep because she didn't want to sleep alone anymore.  She wanted to share her room with Z.  :*(  D & I were heartbroken!  We agree with her 100%, but we still have to wait.  At times, I don't even understand why we have to keep waiting, so it's no surprise that a 4-year-old can't understand either.  DJ seems to understand much better, but he still retains keen insight that I wish he could tell Congress!  He really gets the orphan's cry and thinks the sooner they can find a home and a family, the better everyone would be.  He's been surprisingly good at keeping me grounded throughout this emotional roller coaster.  Most of the time, he knows just what to say to cheer me up and remind me of the big picture as I get lost in the technicalities of the confusing legalization process.  I always knew adoption would bring us a new child to love, but I never expected it to give me new ways to love the children we already have!

Nightmare averted!

Ok, I was overreacting.  But, to be fair, the solution was not obvious to anybody and it was nowhere to be found in our mound of papers/information.  D called our agency and the solution is almost laughable.  Because getting the various people who signed various forms to visit a notary is just not going to happen, we can simply write a statement at the bottom of the form or on the back that says, "I attest that this is the signature of ...." and then we can sign.  The notary can then notarize OUR signature to that statement.  Oh, how I love silly loopholes!  (Except for when I don't think of them first....)

I was worried that even if that works in the states, it might not work here where rules are set in stone and friendly loopholes are all but nonexistent.  I called a different Notar this morning.  (Yeah, the other one permanently lost my business by being so rude after I had such a tough time getting there in the first place)  This time, I got to speak to the actual Notar so I can trust the information!  A MAJOR plus!!  His English was great and we were able to fully understand each other, which is another HUGE plus!  I explained that many of the people who signed would not be able to go there and told him what our agency said and asked if we could do that.  He had no problem with it at all!  He said that all he could do was notarize a signature of someone that was in the office and that he could certainly notarize our signatures to that statement.  Yay!!!  I wanted to make sure I knew how to do the next step of certifying and he said that he could actually do that for us and it would likely only take 2 days!  Hooray!!  He said it would be best to come in this afternoon so he can get everything done before he goes on vacation for 2 weeks.  Even better since I was wanting all of this done weeks ago!  The sooner, the better!!  We have an appointment for an oil change this afternoon too, so I'm really hoping they are on time and can get it changed quickly.  (Germans might have a reputation for punctuality, but it has NOT been my experience!)  As soon as the oil change is done, we can head downtown and get a MAJOR source of sleeplessness on my part taken care of!  Yay!!

As if that wasn't good enough news, my mom also got our birth certificates and marriage license and mailed those to our agency yesterday, so those are done.  AND, our home study agency went ahead and sent our addendum to the USCIS too!  She said that she would send my copy and the placing agency's copy once she received my check, but that she didn't want us to have to wait any longer for the USCIS!  I know we aren't quite Dossier ready yet, but we are so close and it feels GREAT!!  :-)

A New Nightmare

I am still in the heat of the emotions of the moment, so hopefully I am blowing this entirely out of proportion.  I REALLY hope!!

This morning, I rushed through my weekly grocery shopping trip, threw the cold food in the fridge, and drove to the notary.  It should have been an easy 20 minute on the Autobahn.  It ended up being an hour-long drive that started on the Autobahn, but ended going every which way "through town" after a ridiculously long "Stau" (My favorite German word - means any form of traffic congestion, jam, etc.)  So, I was already a little stressed when N & I made it to the Notar, but I was determined to make the best of it.  We found the place rather easily thanks to our GPS, and we even got lucky enough to find a FREE parking lot nearby!  I know that seems like no big deal to you in the states, but here that is a HUGE deal!!  Like, the rough equivalent to "driving 90 past a state trooper on the interstate and having him wave and tell you to have a nice day" huge!  (I would add "through construction", but that might be a tiny exaggeration....)  I got N into his stroller and enjoyed a nice walk along the tiny sidewalk that is right next to a busy road....Ok, I was a little freaked out by that, but I also acknowledged that the Germans don't ever do stupid things like drive on sidewalks....well, not with people on them anyways.  /rant

After our lovely 5-10 minute walk, we entered the building and discovered that the Notar was on the 2nd floor.  (That means 2 flights of stairs here, not 1)  I saw a sign that said there was an elevator, but I couldn't tell where it was indicating and there were more stairs where I thought it said to go, so I assumed I wasn't reading it right.  I collapsed the stroller and carried it up the stairs while holding N & my folder of documents in the other arm.  And it was my bulky stroller.  I hadn't even thought to bring the umbrella stroller in case of steps!  D'oh!!  Anyways, we made it and once there, I re-strapped N into the stroller to keep him contained so he didn't destroy an office.  The receptionist spoke very little English and basically had no idea what I was asking for.  (Um, hello...you are a Notar!  People come to you to get things Notarized!)  She went and gave my pile to someone else (not the actual Notar), who eventually came out and asked me what I wanted from them.  I explained that I needed all of the documents notarized, so that we could get them certified, then authenticated and that all of this was for an adoption.  She just stared through me.  Finally, she said that she didn't know what I needed.  She said that she could either make certified copies of the documents or she could notarize the signatures, but that every person who signed our documents would have to physically come into their office.  I explained that we had to have originals, but that most of the people who had signed would not be able to come to their office.  Heck, 2 of the signatures are from IL!!  She didn't care.

I see her point, but this is just so frustrating!!  Most of the signatures (our Dr. and the lady who certified translations of our police reports), have stamps over them which are supposed to verify that they are valid signatures.  Apparently, those mean nothing.  The process of having to get everything notarized, then certified, then authenticated (twice!) was already daunting enough, but having to get so many people to physically travel to this office during there insanely short & inconvenient business hours is just not possible!  I mean, how many doctors do you know who would be willing to leave their practice for half of a day, then drive 20 minutes each way just to say ,"Yes, I signed that...you know, right UNDER MY STAMP!"  It's just unheard of!  I have been trying for the last hour to call the Crescent Moon Embassy to see if this step is actually important or if we can somehow get around it, but they still won't answer the phone.  Tonight, I will have D call our placing agency and try to relay what it going on and see if they can think of a solution, but I have a feeling they are just going to say that we have to figure it out on our own.  :-(  As easy as it is to get things notarized in the states, I never would've thought that we would have such a hard time doing this step here.  I am hoping to have some positive news about this soon....

German documents

Today, we finally received our certified translations of our local police clearances in the mail.  Then, I took all 3 kids (the Kindergarten had the day off, probably because of the big UEFA game) back to the doctor to get his signatures/stamps on more forms.  The last forms he filled out, he accidentally spelled our last names wrong.  Oops!  But, he was more than willing to sign new ones, so we now officially have EVERYTHING we need to go to the local notary.  Crazy as I am, I am actually tempted to drive there will all 3 kids in tow without D to get this done so we can move on to the next step!  But, since I spent the morning essentially dragging them all around town running various errands, I think maybe I will wait until Monday morning.  The benefit of waiting until then is that DJ & L will be in Kindergarten, so I will only have to keep N entertained while the Notary does his thing.  I am one of those people that wants to do things as soon as I can possibly do them, so here's what I am telling myself to keep patient.  (This may or may not be true, but it has at least an 85% chance of being true and that's good enough for me)  If we went to the Notary right now and got everything notarized right now, it would be very stressful for myself & the kids, then we would still have to wait until Monday to go wherever it is that we need to go to get them certified because they are most likely closed already.  So, if I wait until Monday, it will be less stressful AND we can probably go ahead and get them certified that same day and be no worse off than if I went and got them Notarized now!  Now, if Monday would just hurry up and get here!  :-P

In other news, our home study agency has written our addendum to correct the problem that the USCIS has with our original home study.  They will be getting that notarized next week and mailing it to the USCIS as soon as they received the check that I just mailed today.  I hope the USCIS officer will accept an addendum instead of requiring a completely new home study.  The home study agency seemed confident that they would, so I will just have to take their word for it since they would know better than me!

Things are moving along and I couldn't be more excited!!  DJ and L have been extremely interested in all of the details lately and they are getting more and more excited to meet their new little sister.  I love their excitement and interest!   DJ is even more adorable lately.  He wants to pray that God would heal her of her blindness, but he wants me to let him be the first one to pray for her.  He's got such faith and I would LOVE to see God meet that faith with a miracle!  :-D

I-800A RFE

Our placing agency notified us that they received an RFE (Request for Evidence) from our USCIS agent.  Surprisingly, this is pretty good news.  And, just like my dream, I'm really calm about it.  Our home study had approved us for Z, but the USCIS agent did not like that it was for a specific child and wanted it to be for a certain type of child.  Easy to fix!  And, there was no mention of needing any "letter" from Germany, so I'm quite excited about that!  I have emailed our home study contact about the necessary change and I haven't heard back yet, but this is where the time zones are against me.  I *hope* to have heard something by tonight or tomorrow at the latest, because it sounds like once that is corrected and sent in, we will get our approval and can move to the next step!  I am so glad God gave me that dream last week about us getting an RFE and me being totally at peace about it, because when I read those letters in the email, I didn't freak out like I probably would have without that assurance of peace.  :-)

We also got our letter from D's work, so the only thing we are waiting on is a translation of our German police reports, then we can start notarizing, etc..  D is still trying to get in touch with the right people at his former language school to find out how much it will cost.  I will never get used to how SLOW and painful stuff like that is here!  The good news is that we are making progress every day it seems!  It won't be long now and we might actually have an estimated travel time frame, which I am dying to know!  Once we have an idea of when we will travel, we can figure out what we're going to do with DJ, L, and N while we get Z.  I would like them to come with us and get to see Crescent Moon, but D doesn't want to worry about them having jet lag and potentially misbehaving in a foreign country, especially during any official adoption procedures!  Depending on when we can go there, we might ask family to come watch them in Germany or possibly have family meet us in Crescent Moon to watch over them during official stuff.  D has also considered sending the kids to America to stay with family there, but the idea of them being on a plane by themselves is just too much for me, but it doesn't make sense for us to fly to America, then Crescent Moon, then back to America, then to Germany again.  But, we've got time to get all of that figured out!  I would also love to be able to attend my best friend's wedding in September, but I don't want to book tickets until I know whether or not I will even be able to make it.  Everything will work out in the end and it isn't worth worrying about when I don't even know details yet.

No News is Good News....Right?

We still have not heard anything from the USCIS.  I am torn about this.  I can't decide whether to start getting excited that we are likely going to be approved or whether to worry that our documents will expire because it will take us so long to fulfill a request for evidence.  I have spent more time than I care to think about trying to get an idea of how long people generally have to wait to get their approvals and it really just seems to depend on which agent they get.  Some people have gotten approvals 28 days later and others have waited 63 for a Request for Evidence!  I don't like such widely different time frames and not knowing which one we will be closer to.  Wednesday, I woke up feeling very discouraged in general and was just pessimistic about everything in general.  Luckily those days don't happen often, but the stress of everything just sort of hit me all at once that day.  That afternoon when I was trying to stay numb and not think about any of the things I constantly think about (especially about the adoption!), I had a thought flood my mind.  I got a very strong impression that the agent in charge of our case was finalizing our approval notice and putting the last seals on everything so it could get mailed soon.  That really turned my day around!  I pray that it is true!!  Of course, the next night I dreamt that we got an RFE (Request for Evidence) and had to go about getting a letter from Germany.... I pray that one isn't true!  Though, in that dream, I was able to remain calm, so if we do get at RFE, I will take the calm with it.  ;-)

In other news, we are trying to get certified translations of our local police reports.  I got a quote from a lady just down the street.  Oh man!!  60 Euros is for the certification itself and I understand that.  She said there was an extra 19% on top of that for the VAT, but it was my understanding that the VAT was included.  No way to argue that one though.  :-\  The police reports contain about 83 German words, most of which are basic enough that even I know them.  She is going to charge us about 40 Euros for the translation!  I am not ok with that.  It's 98 cents per "line" and she's charging for 42 lines.  There are 2 reports (one for me and one for my husband), so maybe she means 21 lines per report.  BUT, the German words are all identical.  The only things that are different are the names and birthdays and those don't need translated!  And, even still, 21 lines seems excessive.  So, D is contacting his former German language teacher because the business that she works for also offers certified translations.  We are hoping that they can do it for a much more reasonable fee, especially considering how much money they have made teaching him German!  Aside from that, we are still waiting.  Waiting to receive a few more things in the mail so that we can begin the notarization, certification, and double authentication process.  Then we will mail those to our agency and wait some more.  I think the general theme of adoptions is "hurry up and wait"!  lol!  I am hoping to get things moving so I can stop checking my mailbox 17 times per day!  (Seriously, I've gotten a bit neurotic about checking for mail....it might be a problem....)  Not to mention, I want to find out more about Z and I have found a great support system that seems like they can probably fill me in on a lot of information and possibly even get me in touch with her foster family.  (See, I didn't even know she HAD a foster family until I found this group!  Now I know she does, but I can't find out who yet)  I can't make contact with anyone until we have our approval.  Then, the emails can start flying!  ;-)

Paper Trail: Take 2

I would apologize for not updating in the last week since it feels like so much has been going on, but it's mostly been me freaking out so I don't think you'll mind too much.  ;-)

Anyways, now I have finally figured out what is going on and what I need to do.  Yay!!  We have re-ordered most of our documents in duplicate.  (Luckily, this time we don't need the triplicate!)  My mom is awesome and is getting our court documents (marriage license & birth certificates) for us and getting them certified and all that too!  We also have several close friends and family who are helping us out with new letters of recommendation and a guardianship statement.  Basically, our friends and family rock!!  :-)  This side of the pond, we are still waiting on our medical exam complete with tons of new blood work, but that's on Thursday morning, so we should get it by next week.  We will then just be waiting on D's 2 documents he needs to get from work.  Sadly, those could take long enough to hold us up but I am hoping the people who are kind enough to do those for us are having slow days and don't mind getting those to us by next week.  Once we get those, the real "fun" begins!!

We get to take all of our "German originating" documents to a local Notar (notary).  They will notarize all of the original documents for us as well as provide us with notarized copies of our passports and our 2011 tax returns (which we just got last week!  That's another blessing, but that's another story...) In the US, notaries are easy enough to get at most banks/credit unions and are virtually (if not entirely) free.  Here, not so much.  Notaries are actually pretty elite.  There are only so many of them registered and there's a cap, so finding one isn't terribly easy.  They are also expensive.  We're going to be paying 13 Euros PER DOCUMENT!  We need 18 documents total!  And, as if that weren't bad enough, after they are notarized we have to get them certified by the "district court".  I am only guessing on who this is.  The Notar will tell us, so I'm not terribly worried about being vague on this detail.  But, if it's who I think it is, then we're looking at another 13 Euros per document!  But, that just isn't quite enough pain yet.  Then, we have to send them off to the Federal Office of Administration to be Authenticated by Germany.  The fee?  15 Euros per document!!  And, because that doesn't cause me to hyperventilate enough just thinking about it, we have to take these notarized, certified, and German authenticated documents to the Crescent Moon embassy in Frankfurt to have then Authenticated once more!  The cost?  Another 15 Euros per document!  Oh, they are bleeding us dry!!!  Over 1,000 Euros just to get our documents authenticated!  Yikes!!!  In America, this entire procedure would be 1 step less AND cost practically nothing!!  I knew we would be paying more to have things done while we live overseas, but I expected the cost to come from shipping and online ordering fees and things like that, certainly not from such a crazy complicated process!  And this doesn't even include the last 2 weeks that I spent frantically scouring the internet and calling several Crescent Moon embassies (who, btw, don't answer their phones when they are supposed to and who are lucky to speak English) before I finally called the German Federal Office of Administration in Köln and got in touch with someone who explained everything very clearly.  It was the most stressful part of the process so far!  German bureaucracy is a nightmare in itself, but adding Crescent Moon's craziness in there was just too much for me!  BUT, at least now we know what we need to do!  That's the great news!!

As for my I-800A, I still haven't heard anything else.  I have convinced myself that if I don't get a pink slip (the dreaded "Request for Evidence" that can cause everything to come to a screeching halt) in the mail tomorrow, I can breathe a little bit easier.  Why tomorrow, I'm not really sure.  It just popped into my head and when I do the math, it makes sense there too, so I'm going with it.  ;-)  My placing agency told me that I should call and speak with the agent handling our case and ask how long they think it will be before we get our acceptance letter so we can know when we need to have our documents ready by, but I haven't gotten the guts to do that yet.  I mean, this person has the power to approve or deny us and I don't want to say something stupid that will make them turn us down.  Maybe if I don't get that pink slip in the mail tomorrow, I will be brave enough to call.  We'll see.  :-)

Things are going.  Not as quickly as I would like, but they are still moving at a good speed - at God's speed - and I am good with that!  I will continue to keep you posted.

-V

Extension

We have gotten our extension with Crescent Moon, so now we have until September 13th to get our paperwork in!  That *should* be easy to do.  I hope!  At this point, I'm pretty sick of any and all paperwork and we're not out of the woods yet.  I got an email from our placing agency today and it almost made my head explode when I first read it.  Then a few hours later, I tried to just think about what it had said and it almost made my head explode again.  Now, 12 hours later, I can finally read it.  (Did I ever mention that adoption is a stressful process?)  It looks like instead of them getting our documents authenticated, we are going to have to do all of that ourselves.  It looks like we will have to re-order most, if not all, of our documents with an over-abundance of state seals then get them certified AND notarized in Germany.  Then, we will have to take them to the Crescent Moon embassy, which is in Berlin, to get them authenticated.  Oh, how this stresses me out!  Simply re-ordering all the documents was about a 6-7 on a scale of 10.  But, having to get anything official from the German government is going to be a nightmare!  They won't touch American documents.  It's some weird rule they have.  So, I have NO idea how that's going to work!  Then we have to potentially drive to Berlin.  It's on the other side of the country!  I really hope we can do that by mail, but I'm not even sure they will speak English.  Having German as our common language isn't very comforting.  :-\  We are going to call our placing agency now that they should be in the office and get more clarification, but this is massively overwhelming today.  I really hope this is easier than it sounds because it sounds like climbing Mt. Everest in swim fins might be easier.  :-(

Paperwork headaches

We did our paper chase as soon as we were given the green light, which left our documents dated from mid-September to the beginning of October.  I always heard they were valid for a year (some for 18 months or even 2 years), so I wasn't worried because I was confident that we would be able to complete everything in that time-frame since we already had our child selected.  Well, apparently we are going to need to re-order several (if not all!) of the documents again because they need to be less than 6 months old to be "authenticated".  I'm not exactly sure what that means yet, but I'm assuming that they mean they need to be less than 6 months before they get sent to Crescent Moon with our Dossier.  *sigh*  I'm a little bummed about the cost of replacing all of those documents, but I'm much more upset about the time and headache that will be involved in re-ordering them.  I had at one time saved all of the request forms, but since I figured I would no longer need them, I might have to look them up all over again.  It sounds easy, but is surprisingly difficult.  My mom had to order several of the forms for me because I no longer have a US driver's license or state issued ID.  Apparently, Passports don't count as verification when ordering state documents and they sure don't care about my German driver's license!  I'm telling you, just knowing that I will have to go through that nightmare again is going to be a thorn in my flesh until it's over again!  I was SO happy when I was done because I thought I was DONE!  I'm trying very hard not to blame our home study agency for taking 3 months longer than they promised, but if they had gotten the correct home study to us on time, our document would still be less than 6 months old.  :-(  I know the adoption process is an uncertain thing, but I always thought the many government agencies involved would be the unpredictable ones!  I never expected a "respectable" agency would be the one to screw us up so badly!  Right now we've got a lot going on with DJ switching schools in the fall and a TON of bureaucratic nightmares there, so I'm probably over-reacting to the need to order more documents, but right now it feels like a ton of bricks on me.  I'm just very grateful that we have the money to cover the additional cost and to know that despite set-backs like this, everything is still in God's hands.  He is still watching over Z and He is still directing and guiding the process.  I just hope I don't break from all the stress in the process.

I-800A Received

Technically, this isn't really a big step or anything, but it's something so I'm still excited about it!  I just received my email saying that the USCIS has received our application and it is being routed to the National Benefits Center for processing.  This is our biggest obstacle and yet I am feeling a mixture of overwhelming calm and excitement, but I'm not afraid or nervous at all.  Now is the time we get to witness God perform a miracle!!  :-) As always, I will keep you posted!

I-800A application

Hurray!!!  We finally got our revised home study in the mail yesterday!!  Good timing because I woke up freaking out that our Dossier deadline was only a month and a half away and that we were doomed if it didn't get here yesterday.  2 and a half months of stressing about the home study has really taken its toll on me, so I am glad that part is OVER!!!!  (Yes, I'm SO glad that it warrants overuse of exclamation points!  lol!)

As soon as D and I read over the home study to make SURE the errors were gone, we stuffed in in the envelope with the I-800A application that we printed MANY months ago, copies of our birth certificates, a copy of our marriage license, fingerprint cards for each of us, and a large check.  Unfortunately, it was too late to make it to the "main" post offices, so we went a little out of the way to go to Globus (a little like Wal-Mart) where they have a mail station that is open much later.  I was expecting to pay handsomely to get the envelope there ASAP, but they said that it would only cost 3.45 Euros!  They said I could pay more, but that it wouldn't actually get there any faster, so there wasn't much point.  And, as important as the contents are to me, they are easily replaceable on the off chance that they get lost, so there wasn't much point in paying more for that either. They said they guessed the envelope would get there in 6-7 days.  Based on my experience mailing letters, that sounds about right to me.  Sometimes they get there even faster, but it's going to TX, so it might take a bit longer than they do to get to IL.  Maybe.  Our placing agency said the approval process typically takes about 10 weeks, but I am hoping that since we already included fingerprints it will be much quicker.

So, now we wait for our application to get to TX, then we wait for them to review it.  I wonder if God had our home study have so many delays so that a certain person might get hired by the USCIS that will approve our case.  This is *the* step that we foresaw being the major hurdle.  If we can get this approval, we should be good.  Getting Z a German visa may be tricky, but that shouldn't be too bad since she will be a US citizen at that point.  But, this is the step where the USCIS may ask us for that mythical "letter" from Germany.  If that happens, I'm prepared to put up a good fight.  We have a LOT of evidence that easily points to us being "habitual residents" of the US, which I am hoping might persuade the German officials to provide this "letter".  If not, hopefully it is enough to convince the USCIS that we meet the criteria even if Germany won't give us the "letter".  My overactive mind also has "plans" to try to track down and meet with some of the political higher ups of Germany.  The new president of Germany always struck me as the kind of guy who might be willing to take a stand for our situation and maybe change the anti-adoption mentality that many Germans seem to hold.  If it comes to it, I will seek him out and, who knows, maybe that will bless more families than just ours by changing the long-held mindset of this country.  I don't really think I will have to do any of the above "persuading", but I always have a "plan B" forming in my mind.  (It's kind of annoying actually)  At any rate, I feel a wonderful peace knowing that the fate of our adoption and Z is now completely in God's hands!  I know that He will deliver our application to the right person and that He will guide the process along.

Impatient

Today, I am feeling rather impatient.  I was hoping to have received our corrected home study by now.  I got an email from the home study agency on the 16th saying that they would send it out within the week.  It does not typically take mail sent via standard mail that long to get here, but I would've hoped they would have expedited it.  Apparently not.  :-\

Yesterday morning as we were walking out the door to take DJ & L to Kindergarten, L tells me that she wants her "little girl from Crescent Moon" to be here already.  Completely out of the blue!!  Talk about tugging at my heartstrings!  DJ tried to tell her that she could have Z be her "invisible friend", but L didn't want her to be invisible.  She wanted her to really be here for real.  *insert sound of heart breaking*  SO DO I, L, SO DO I!!!  :*(

Last night, I dreamed that I visited her at her orphanage.  Thanks to our "friend", the Hague convention, any contact with her is forbidden at this point in the process.  (I do have a few tricks up my sleeve for the day we can initiate contact!)  At any rate, in my dream I was sneaking through some large industrial-looking kitchen not even knowing where I was or why I was sneaking.  Then, I came out into a large garden/yard where there were lots of children running around playing.  Another couple was there and one of the workers handed them a child who might have been around 18 months and the worker was telling them that they didn't believe in diapers, so if the child needed to potty, to just take the child outside and hold him over some grass and he would do his thing.  (This is not far-fetched, actually)  The parents agreed and happily took their new child and left.  I was a little jealous of how easy they made everything look!  I explained to the worker who we were and that we were working on adopting Z and that we were still too early in the process to see her, but that I was wondering how she was doing.  The worker invited me into the fence (the other couple had to stay on the other side) and told me to wait for just a minute.  I was a bit afraid of getting into some sort of trouble, so I nervously looked around for Z, but didn't see her.  I couldn't resist and played with a few of the nearby kids while I waited.  The worker came back holding Z!!  I wasn't sure what to think, but she told me I could go ahead and take her!  Z was very shy and her hair was (badly) cut short and she wasn't your typical little girl from "Crescent Moon", but to me she was the most beautiful sight!  I woke up not knowing if I actually ended up taking her with me or following the law and leaving her there until we could legally gain custody.  But, just getting to "see" her was so reassuring!  I can't wait for the day when we will actually get to meet her!!

Great quote!

I just came across a great quote that is really encouraging to me while dealing with all of our recent set-backs.

"An arrow can only be shot by pulling it backward. So when life is dragging you back with difficulties, it means that it's going to launch you into something great."

I already know that we're trying to go towards "something great", but it's helpful to think of the possibility of being "launched" into it rather than slowly crawling toward it (which is what it's felt like on good days lately). I realize this is just a quote and does not necessarily reflect the reality much of the time, but since we're obviously being "pulled back" a lot lately I'll take any encouragement I can get!

Waiting, AGAIN!

I emailed Dr. A and she said it would probably be fine to send our home study as is, but D & I didn't feel very confident about that. I called USCIS and they said we needed to get a correct home study before we submit our I-800A. UGH!!! I am feeling like nothing is going right! I KNOW there's got to be a reason, but it would sure be nice to know what it is so I can stop freaking out! I emailed Dr. A back and asked how long it would take to get a corrected version and I'm waiting to hear back. I'm hoping they can expedite it since they made the mistake and they know the hurry we are in, but I'm expecting her to say 2-3 weeks again. :-\

In more positive news, I had another dream about Z last night. Oh, she was SO precious!! We were riding a bus in Crescent Moon after having picked her up and she was so sweet! She was brave and wondering around the bus despite being blind. She obviously couldn't see anything, yet she somehow magically maintained eye contact with me as much as a sighted child would who was deeply in love with me. Oh, it was wonderful!! We played blocks and I showed her how they sounded when beat against each other and against the floor and helped her to feel them. It was so magical! She went over to our local guide/translator and she helped her up to her lap. The guide asked me what her name was and I hesitated for a bit and told her a slightly wrong name that didn't sound quite right and Z made a funny face at me. Then I remembered and told her the proper name and Z smiled and said, "That's my name!!" and kind of giggled that cute little girl giggle. I know it must not sound like much of a dream, but I woke up more in love with her than I already was and I didn't think that could be possible! It's good to have some encouragement that we will still get to bring her home despite this process indicating otherwise.... *sigh*

Home Study!!

As I pulled into the driveway after picking the children up from school today, I saw the FedEx truck. I literally starting chanting, "Please be for me, please be for me, please be for me!" and my children thought I was crazy! lol! The way he was going though, he would have already visited the house. When I got to the door, I tried not to be too excited, but immediately wanted to check the mailbox in the hope that they would not have required a signature. D had beaten me home for lunch and I heard him as soon as I got in the door, "Guess what came today?!" Talk about excitement!! Though, the home study agency had told me that I needed a letter from the placing agency saying they had approved it before we could submit our I-800A, so I wasn't AS excited as I wanted to be because I knew we still had to wait for that. Still, I just HAD to open it and see the actual study for myself.... to my complete surprise, that other letter was included! The placing agency sent it to them instead of to me. SWEET!!! Now all we need is for D to add his signatures and then mail this beautiful STACK of an application to the USCIS! YAY!!!

I had already read a draft of the home study and informed them of a few errors I had found. The placing agency did the same, so I was confident that everything would be accurate and since I had already read through it once, there was no reason to do so again. Still, having it in my hands begged at least a cursory glance. While I skimmed about 3 pages, I found 3 errors. All relating to D. I'm trying to not panic. If those errors need to be corrected, that will likely set us back another 2-3 weeks and a decent amount of money for shipping it again. Though, I'm hoping that won't happen. The most frustrating thing is that 1 of the errors was one that I had pointed out after I read the draft and the other 2 were correct in the draft and somehow got changed. It isn't exactly MY fault! I am hoping and praying that they are minor enough that we can submit it as is! One of the errors is that they forgot to mention that D resided in Iowa, despite the child abuse report from Iowa and the fact that we lived together there and they mentioned it for me. I don't think that is very important, but what do I know. The other 2 mistakes are that they switched D's birth city and the city he grew up in. They are about an hour apart on a map, so not that drastic, right? The only problem I can see there is that it will not match his birth certificate, which we also have to include a copy of. :-(

I sent an email to 2 contacts at our home study agency to see whether it is ok to submit as is or whether they will have to correct these mistakes. Not only is God teaching me patience (and tolerance for other people not doing things the way I want them to) but I think He's got me in the advanced course!! *sigh*