On the verge?

I have this strange feeling today. It's a little hard to explain, but it somehow feels like we're ridiculously close to starting a whirlwind adoption process. Like we're crossing a threshold and we've finally made it to the door, we've picked up our foot to take the last step through the door and it's mid-swing - that's where I feel right now. I'm not sure why I feel this anticipation, but I like it! I'm not anxious or impatient, just ready. As if it could be only a matter of days before I'm emailing and calling and tracking down required paperwork and we're taking online training courses and meeting with the people who will complete our home study. I'm so ready! After waiting many years to submit our dossier and wait some more, I'm feeling more and more like God's leading us away from the slow marathon-waiting style of adoption and more into the blazing fast 5K sprint style! It'll be hectic, that's for sure! It'll be hard to watch our bank account drain so quickly (one MAJOR perk of having the long wait is that the fees are also spread out!). I'm sure I'm going to feel overwhelmed by having such a long list of things to get done NOW. But, I can do crazy, rushed, hectic. Especially if it's only for a few months! And, the pay-off is that we'll get to go get our new child that much sooner! :-D Bring it on!!

-V

A New Door?

A lot has happened since I last blogged. I have been in email contact with many new people/agencies who have helped to confirm that while living in Germany, it is absolutely impossible to adopt from any Hague convention country. For some reason, I can now accept this as truth rather than trying to find a way to be the exception to the rule. For me, this is HUGE!!! (Right, Mom? lol!) Yet, I know this isn't the end of our journey, or even a delay. Maybe it's more of a detour? The person (RB) who finally convinced me of the truth that we cannot adopt from the country we always wanted also suggested a similar non-Hague country that he has been working with many families to adopt from. Other people had also suggested other options, but none of them sounded appealing before, yet this time the suggestion struck a chord.

Yesterday, I also met with a lady from our church who has adopted in the past and she shared bits and pieces of her stories (she has so many!) and really encouraged me! She gave me 2 especially great pieces of advice that I will be sure to hold onto! One is to not get ahead of myself on the paper-chase because forms expire, so the timing is very important. This is especially good for me to remember because if it were up to me, I would already have all the documents notarized and ready, but then they might not be valid when we need them to be. The other piece of advice is to never underestimate the value of a closed door. She shared her own journey that she said was so frustrating at the time because it felt like doors were constantly being closed on her and it was so discouraging! Yet, in the end, she said that she could clearly see how God was moving to make sure that she and her husband stayed exactly where He wanted them and that they were able to get the children that God had planned for them. This was very encouraging! And the more I think about it, the more I think that God put country #1 on my heart for so long just to keep me from adopting too soon. (It's the only one I was willing to wait for) Then, He brought us to the ONE country that won't let us do that adoption! (Seriously, Italy, France, Spain, etc....All ok with it, just not Germany!) Maybe He has done all of this to get us ready to adopt, but not too soon. I have found an agency who works with many countries and is able to help us adopt from our new country, which I will nickname "Tiger" because tigers are cool! I don't think tigers actually live in that country, but how cool would that be if they did!?

At this point, this is where we are at: Watching, praying, and waiting. The Agency has given me access to their list of waiting children. When I see a child that I would like to know more about, I can email them and they will send me the child's file to review. Then D and I carefully look the file over to see if we would be able to meet the needs of the child. Then we pray, a lot. If we come across the right child, then we say that we would like to adopt that one. At that point, the Agency then forwards our information to the Home in "Tiger" (yup, cool already!) and the Home makes the final decision of whether we can adopt that child. They may have many families interested and need to select the best fit or we may be the only family interested, in which case, we get the child. Once the Home says we are approved to adopt that child, the Agency takes care of a whirlwind of paperwork and setting court dates and all sorts of crazy stuff while we get all excited and sign forms and make travel arrangements. :-) A fairly quick, yet crazy process! There are a LOT of places for God to direct us to the child He has chosen for us. Which is good, but will probably result in at least a little disappointment along the way. I'm ok with that. I would rather get the right child in the long run. I will be sure to keep you posted as we make any progress.

Next step: Formal application (which is quite lengthy!!)

-V